I believe that there is nothing that can prepare you for the changes of fatherhood. You can read every book, pamphlets, watch every dvd, get advice from other parents, friends, doctors, attend every parenting classes, you will never be completely prepared, all this does is provide you will a good foundation of parenting knowledge.
I just want to share some thoughts to help give you an idea of what fatherhood might be like – remembering that every family, baby, person, father and experience is different.
When I was asked on how I felt after becoming a father, I took a deep breath and let my feelings do the talking:
It feels good to be seen with my family
- It’s emotionally draining
- I have a feeling of achievement and pride
- I feel I have achieved a milestone in my adult life
- I feel happy
- Feel fulfilled, contented
- Feeling of being needed
- Finally a family completed me.
- A new reason in life
My personal thought’s on how I was feeling, during the pregnancy, at birth and when we came home.
- I can remember most of the details of the build-up to the birth; my feelings, her feelings, the doctor’s appointments and milestone events. It was fascinating.
- I used to think `I’m so young, should I be a father, am I ready?’
- I thought about – will we cope financially.
- My partner had a great pregnancy so I was relaxed; I was nesting, kicking back and just waiting around – she went overdue with both babies so there was a lot of waiting!
- I had a strong commitment to be there when I was needed.
- I expected difficulties but we became closer, we found new ways to be intimate.
- I became a lot closer with my partner during the pregnancy, until the baby was born then I felt left out, but as they get older it does get easier.
- At the birthing clinic – I felt a part of it. I could not imagine her doing it without me.
- It’s an amazing experience to see my children take their first breath.
- The midwife said I should cut the cord. – I said nope. (That is not my thing.)
- I left the hospital early in the morning, looked up at the stars, and said thank-you.
- I was on a high for days and talked and still do, talk about the miracle of birth.