Dear Mum on the Iphone
But that blog post does keep popping back into my mind, not because it triggers guilty feelings, as I’ve seen mentioned on social media that only people with a guilty conscience would be upset by it… Well, actually, no that’s EXACTLY it… It DOES trigger guilty feelings. Not rational guilt. “Mummy guilt”. It’s similar to the guilt I feel when I spent more than $5 on myself, or when I wake my partner to help me with the kids because part of me thinks I should just handle it all on my own – THAT kind of guilt. “Dear mom on the iphone” to me feeds the irrational guilt that if you aren’t spending every single waking (and sleeping for that matter) moment totally focused on your children you are letting them down.
There is this intense pressure in parenthood – I say parenthood, but I do mean MOTHERhood, but that’s a whole other topic for another day – to love every single moment, of every single day, or you’re doing it wrong. From 5:45am when a chubby little finger on an adorably dimpled fat baby hand gently pokes its way up your nostril as way of rousing you for the day, to when you finally flop back into bed that night, close your eyes, and the second you drift off into dream land a little person cries out for you, you are supposed to feel blissful happiness at all times. Because they love you, they love you so much; they just want to be with you ALL the time. How could being loved so much ever be anything but total joy, every minute, of every day?
Also, “Dear Mom on the Iphone” could just as easily been “Dear Mum reading a book”, “Dear Mum chatting with your friends” “Dear mum knitting” “Dear Mum with an unsettled baby while your older child plays” “Dear Mum staring blankly in zombie-like sleep deprivation”…. all of these activities means that you aren’t giving your child complete attention while they play.
And to be perfectly frank “Mum watch! MUM! WATCH ME! Watch this!” when I’ve seen whatever it is the first dozen times, I’ll admit, it does get a little bit boring.
So, if I could edit Dear Mom on the Iphone this is what it would say:
“Dear Mom On the iPhone, [Or Samsung Galaxy S3]
I see you over there on the bench, messing on your iPhone. It feels good to relax a little while your kids have fun in the sunshine, doesn’t it? You are doing a great job with your kids, you work hard, you teach them manners, have them do their chores.
[THE END] ”