Your Nutella Fail
We have to talk.
Firstly, I want to tell you that I do I love you – and I hope we can work this out. Up until now I felt like we’ve had a pretty good relationship. You’re the ideal chocolate hit for when I don’t want my children to see because it’s easier to scoop out a spoon of your delicious spread while standing in the pantry than it is to try to silently open a block of chocolate. So, thanks for that.
Your recent campaign with putting people’s names on jars of Nutella is genius! It’s something that I’ve done myself – bought multiple jars of Nutella and wrote our names on them, because who wants to share a jar of Nutella? That’s the kind of thing that can break up a relationship! (Really, it was one of my first fights with my partner. I bought a jar of Nutella, and then a couple of days later I went to have some Nutella and it was all gone. I nearly cried.) So brilliant. Good work.
Also as the parent of two children who will probably never find their names on existing labels, being able to personalise a label is also a very very good idea.
So far, so good.
W. T. F?
Seriously. Did your marketing team get drunk one day and be like :
“Let’s TELL people we can make them personalised labels, and then refuse to print names that we don’t like.”
“Haha that’s a great idea, we should discriminate against little girls named after Egyptian goddesses.”
“This’ll be great. People will love this. Pass me another beer.”
Okay, we get it I.S.I.S is bad. But Isis is a legit name. It really really is. And all that should have happened in this situation is if their computer or whatever system flags it as inappropriate an actual living, breathing, feeling person should have said “Whoops, sorry about that, I’ll print that label out for your small child immediately, sorry about the mix up.” SIMPLE. Fixed. Done.
But nope. The response was this really vague PR faux-pology.
“Like all campaigns, there needs to be consistency in the way terms and conditions are applied. Unfortunately, this has meant there have been occasions where a label has not been approved on the basis that it could have been misinterpreted by the broader community or viewed as inappropriate.”
The broader community, aside from a few douchey bogans, are going “PRINT THE LITTLE GIRL’S NAME! WE’RE NOT THAT STUPID! WE KNOW IT’S NOT INAPPROPRIATE!!”
I’d understand if the names being banned were things like “Asshole” or “Dickhead” – that’s fair – but not printing actual names of real people isn’t cool!
Other names that have allegedly been refused (according to the general outrage on the Nutella Facebook page) include “Gay” (FYI Gay is my mother’s maiden name… it’s really really a real name… ) Jock (also a name) Sahar and Fatima (NAMES!!!!) and another parent was apparently told that her son’s name Jibril wasn’t acceptable.
Those things may or may not have happened, because we shouldn’t believe everything we read on Facebook but we do know that Nutella have refused to give a little girl a personalised Nutella label because they’re afraid of her name. Her name really isn’t scary. In the wise words of Dumbledore (or possibly Hermione Granger, depending on whether you’ve read the books or watched the movie first).
Her name isn’t scary! She’s a 5 year old girl who needs now more than ever to be told that her name is perfectly acceptable – and to heck with the people who made her name look bad – which by the way, we should maybe start calling them Daesh, (Or even Cystisis according to Adam Hills)because they apparently don’t like it and I’m all for doing things that they don’t like.
And I’m strongly against punishing a little girl for things that have absolutely nothing whatsoever to do with her.
Nutella. This isn’t okay. Actually, I feel like we should break up over this.
Sorry. Take care.